Friday, April 20, 2012

The New Blogger: Welcome to Bedlam


To say I hate the new blogger is being truthful, and not unkind.

I woke up this morning to discover...just like a lot of bloggers did.....that the interface behind the secret world of blogging had somehow magically changed over night.

And it is not a kind nor a user friendly place to be. Blogger interface is the place where those of us who blog create, edit, load photos, save settings, and finally publish, all of our blog posts that everyone reads ....but not all of you know about.

This morning I apparently went into the back door to a strange new world where everyone but me had been working all night in Cahoots.

I have been in many places, but I have never been in Cahoots. Apparently you can't go there alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone. Apparently, a whole bunch of blogger techies have been in Cahoots for a very long time planning the complete overthrow of my sanity.


I decided I would not get mad, I would get even. I would learn to use the new blogger interface, which is tantamount to learning to speak aloud in Braille because no matter what I do or say or type, I seemed to be in my own world apart from the rest of the blogger interface.

They didn't seem to see me, hear me, sense me, or listen to me. Not one bit of anything I did would work. Do you see these great big spaces? They will not go away, they look normal to me and show up like this. No one is paying attention to me at all back here in blogger interface land.








I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there. Blogger has not wanted to recognize me in anyway. They have not recognized me as the owner of this blog who has the right to create simple but well thought out blog posts, filled hopefully with a bit of humor, intelligence, and with a lot of photographs of things I love sharing with others. Today, I seemed to be in Cognito to everyone else who has been completely in Cahoots.

I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport. You have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my family, friends and those with whom I have worked. And now, thanks to Blogger and all of those genius I.Q. bloggers. I went from in Cahoots, to in Cognito, to totally in Sane.




Now, my closest ex-friends, and family will tell you that I have always been one step on the wrong side of sanity since childbirth. My mother and father claimed I was supposed to be born on Christmas Day, but the doctor had a Christmas party to get to, so he stuck a mask over my mother's face, ordered my father out of the delivery room, and he had my Alaskan father tell him moose hunting stories until the nurse informed the doctor that my mother's pre-medicated early delivery was imminent.





As a result, I was literally born upside down and backwards. Medical professionals refer to that as transverse and breech but I call it the logical conclusion to those who go into Cahoots, force others to be in Cognito, and cause the rest of us to be labeled in Sane.

I would like to go into a lot of Conclusions, here....but you have to jump to those apparently, and I am not in my best physical shape for vigorous activities, anymore. Why? Because after spending 5 hours trying to figure out the new blogger, I couldn't even unbend my body to stand again, and not only did every single part of me moan, groan, and creak but somehow, I finally magically, accidentally, hit some correct button and saw a glimmer of hope in actually creating a post, saving it and finding my way back to my webpage again. I'm not sure, actually I rather doubt I'll ever be able to do this again. So, right now I am typing as if my life depended on it, because it might end up being the only post I'll ever be able to type again.

I have also been in Doubt, like this, before. That is a sad place to go and I try not to visit there too often. Once you doubt yourself and your ability to do things properly, you are pretty much left in doubt from that point on ...and I hate to be one of those rigid people who is that sure of herself that she knows she will always be in Doubt and not just in Cahoots, in Cognito, or borderline one foot over into in Sane.

Now, I've sat at the computer more hours than that before and I've been in Flexible, before, but only when it was very important to stand firm. It's not my fault that being in Flexible is one of the logical consequences of sitting in a chair for 5 hours staring into a computer monitor while mumbling to myself.




I finally realized at that point, that I was definitely on the verge of being in Coherent. I made myself a cup of hot tea and ate a couple of cookies and thought....you see, you can still take care of business and solve problems after all! I was hungry and I found food and I ate!


Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older. But after visiting the home this morning, and knowing that at 62, I was the youngster there and all of the seniors thought I was brilliant, witty, and kept them all at the edge of their seats with my stories. Ok. several of them were falling asleep, it's true, but most of my tall tales did keep a couple of them wondering what I'd say or do, next! And if the others were just trying to escape, they were apparently more in Capable than I was, but as far as I know...I'm the only one who managed to escape. Now, at one point, I did mention taking them all outside tomorrow for wheel chair races..three agreed and two didn't and one of the two was the home health care aide... but now she's in Doubt with the rest of us in Cahoots, and me in Cognito so I at least we have her wondering!

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense. It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart. At my age I need all of the stimuli I can get...so imagine those eighty and ninety year olds! I may have been a bit over the top for all of them, but if you would have seen their grins, you'd know I was better than nothing and did managed to pull three of them out of Depression. Being in Depression, is just about as bad as it can get. Oh wait..there is one more thing....

Now, if I can just avoid getting in Continent. That's the biggest drawback of sitting in one place for far too long, and then finding out you just can't run as fast as you used to. Ask me how I know....yep, the oldsters at the home told me all about it this morning!

You know, now that I think of it, maybe the new Blogger interface isn't really that bad. It might have upset me for most of the day, but I guess really and truly there are some things, and some places that might be worse!


8674 Come and Play
Michele Bilyeu
for sale at the AAQ website
$45

With thanks to the original jokes that this became a parody of and to the blogger techies who just gave me a reason to keep my brain sharp for one more day ;)

POST NOTE WRITTEN THE NEXT DAY:

After hours of searching I found a way to temporarily be allowed to switch back to the old blogger. I then switched from a dot com domain name to my old blogspot site address and reposted, and republished this blog post in order for me to appear in my Follower's Gadget in the sidebar and in sidebar linking lists for blog following.

This will only work until everyone is officially inducted, against their wills, into the New blogger and only because I figured out how to temporarily get the Old Blogger back. The secret for that is to click on the cogwheel on the horrible new dashboard page and then click on 'return to old blogger'. That option will be removed soon...so enjoy it while you can!

27 comments:

  1. Ok, Michele - now you've got me in Stitches - the kind associating with laughing. Very clever - and I can relate to a lot of it.

    I joined Liberated-Q months ago and have been so overwhelmed by not only my own writing/travel-teaching/DVD/tv/and assorted STUFF - but by the sheer number of posts on that yahoo group. One of these days I'll actually stop lurking and introduce myself to this lively group. I swear, you all sound like you're in your 20's - you are so enthusiastic. Anyway, just saying hello - and I enjoy your blog posts.

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    1. Now, Rayna Gillman, having YOU visit my blog is the one nice thing about this new Blogger interface and me not showing up, at all, in the old blogger sidebar gadget thing that lets other know I have just posted a new blog post.

      How in the world you found me is amazing. Maybe I'm not totally in Cognito, or else maybe just you and I are in Cahoots, but hey...I love everything you do, and your fabulous new book, so I have someone to visit, something in common to read, and before long..as the rest of the inmates discover the craziness of trying to post in the 'New Blogger' we may have enough of us to create a riot and bust me out of this place!

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  2. This was hilarious and I really enjoyed it! But you are so right, the new blogger must be having problems, this point did not show up in my followers list at all! I love coming here so much that I just was checking for new posts when I found this one! Glad I did!

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  3. POST NOTE WRITTEN THE NEXT DAY:

    After hours of searching I found a way to temporarily be allowed to switch back to the old blogger. I then switched from a dot com domain name to my old blogspot site address and reposted, and republished this blog post in order for me to appear in my Follower's Gadget in the sidebar and in sidebar linking lists for blog following.

    This will only work until everyone is officially inducted, against their wills, into the New blogger and only because I figured out how to temporarily get the Old Blogger back. The secret for that is to click on the cogwheel on the horrible new dashboard page and then click on 'return to old blogger'. That option will be removed soon...so enjoy it while you can!

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  4. Enjoyed reading this. LOL! I bet you'll find the new format will be a good friend soon....I hope so....since we want to keep visiting you. ;)

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  5. Brilliantly written! Thanks for the giggles this morning! I cannot offer any help, but can sympathize!

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  6. I voluntarily switched over to the new interface when I saw the warning that it would happen, whether I wanted it to or not, sometime in April. I fussed and fumed and ranted and stormed the first time I tried to post too. Finally I found the little button at the bottom of the list of "Post Settings" on the right hand side of the posting window. I clicked on Options and was able to change the last two settings to make my life easier. This probably won't help you with linking your two domains or solve any Follower problems but it made my blogging life easier.

    I agree with you completely about feeling like I'm in Congnito while the staff of Blogger is in Cahoots. Their customer service is non-existant. In this case, I guess we're getting what we pay for. ;- )

    Great post by the way. :- )

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    1. "In this case, I guess we're getting what we pay for. ;- )"

      Yep, you are SO right, bless you blogger for not charging us (unless we have a domain name, which I do)

      But as Rayna Gillman wrote me after leaving her above comment, AND becoming a follower (thank you, Rayna, and all of my followers) and that's why I still have to complain.

      I will lose that ability to show up in sidebars unless I can still double post, double publish under both site names and that's a heap of trouble as it because I've been disappearing for almost a year now and not being able to change back after switching.

      That's why my blog sometimes says I don't exist and can't be found. (in Cognito) every single morning this past year that I published a post. I guess I was in Sane a long time ago, and hadn't believed it yet. Sigh.

      Now I'm no longer in Doubt.

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  7. Creative writing at its best.
    My answer is a very deep sigh.
    xx, Carol

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    1. Bless you, Carol. I need all the deep breaths I can get... even if they're recycled, and second hand.

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  8. 'Incase' you want to, you can go back to the old interface - I just did it as I couldn't make head nor tales of the new one. Just click on the asterisky thingy on the top right of your page, it has options and wouln't ya knw, there is the old interface option - just *incase*.
    What is it with blogger and facebook - someone somewhere is getting paid something to make the rest of us grumpy - gotta be a man I say : )
    have a great day.
    Miche'le

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  9. What a wonderful post, very well written, and I'm in total agreement! I'm mentioning this post to others, thank you Michelle. I so often am inspired here, btw, thank you for that, too!
    :-}pokey

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  10. Hopefully, it will get easier. I switched a while back, and promptly switched back to old Blogger. But then I tried it again and it seemed somewhat familiar. Hang in there.

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  11. Thanks for this wonderful, humorous, but oh so true post. Each time there is some sort of "upgrade" to Blogger/Facebook/whatever, its seems to me to be a downgrade. No matter what happens on Blogger, please don't stop blogging. I enjoy your thoughtful postings so very much.

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  12. What a fun and wonderful post Michele, I love your play with words!

    I, too, was shocked to find myself in unknown territory yesterday - most of all because my reading list of around 170 blogs had disappeared! But I've got it back now so I'm happy enough (for the moment).
    I write all my post using Windows Live Writer - I get a full screen view and the photos load in seconds - not minutes as it take with Blogger. They go where I want them to too! The only slow part is sending the post to blogger - I always send mine in draft form and make any last minute editing changes (like line spacing) there. You can download Windows Live Writer for free - truly, I would never go back to using that silly little editing screen at Blogger.

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    1. Thanks, Lynne! I'll check this out! Didn't realize it did photos etc. My goodness! Of course, knowing me and the kazillion photos I sometimes put into a tutorial post it will get a hang up. Believe it or not, I had dial up for my first 5 years of blogging! I use a two out of five bars broadband now. Have never had high speed and I still put out long posts, tons of photos and huge links, gadgets, etc. I am a kind of persistent I never realized I was until I started blogging in 2006! But this is a really good tip! I shall check this one, out!!!

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  13. Michele I love your post...you really wrote a wonderful short story for us. I've been to many of the same places even tho I don't blog. You always find a way to make a problem turn around with a bit of humor. Thanks! p.s. I'm glad that Rayna is part of Lib-Q.

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    1. Thanks, Kathleen. To be honest.Rayna thinks its Gwen's message board. Let's not tell her the truth, hey? We might even be able to trick Gwen into thinking it, oh wait..you just met her and had classes with her, fire alarm and all. So she knows who we really are..well, you and Petra ;)

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  14. Hilarious post Michele! It looks like a lot of companies are changing their websites. HubPages is trying out different things too, and I read some things on other places that also look different to me. They are all so like each other - one company decides to make a change, and they all follow suit, trying to be new and innovative, when all they wind up being is more alike than ever. I was able to read this blog post fine from your link, and it shows up on my Google Reader just fine.

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    1. At fist they were all trying to get in on the facebook phase, now they are adding in Pinterest things. You can see me, because I went back to the old blogger for just a bit that they let me and double posed in my old blogspot addy and this domain one. I have been blogpost to show up to anyone. So, the money I spent on the domain was a waste. I used to have 144 technorati points and switching to a dot com brought me down to one...as if I was a new blogger no one had ever heard of and not on anyone link lists. Darn them ...they started my in Cognito and in Visible issue. Now, I need therapy!

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  15. It came at me with no warning -- if we paid attention to every update (Windows, Adobe, Google) there'd be even less Internet time. I muddled through and got a post put up this morning.

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    1. I wish Blogger provided a way to wrap text, the way that Word does. I can't get pictures to line up with the text.

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    2. The more we try, the more we find things we don't like. That's my primary issue! I'm just glad I'm not alone. I always like to think I'm pretty darn good at this stuff for not having any help, ever, and making all of my links, gadgets etc. and doing five years of it on dial-up!!

      Then something new happens and I discover my 3.5 hours of average sleep out of 24 is not helpin...g and is in fact, making me perplexed, bothered, and befuddled when I have to learn new tricks! And with my A.D. genetic history, I need to stay as sharp as I can for as long as I can!! Big sigh!

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  16. Hmmm. Being born upside and backwards accounts for a lot! (Running very fast before I get hit with the fly swat!).

    And before you say anything else, I like the new format, but I have been using it for sometime now.

    xxx

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  17. What a wonderful post Michelle, it so made me smile! I'm currently in Denial and dare not click on the New Interface...or any newfangled gadgetry until I'm in a better place with a cupful more of patience than I currently have....otherwise there'll be only place left, in Consoleable!! x

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    1. Julie,

      Denial is sometimes a good place to be. I have often discovered that in Julie,
      edlam is far, far worse. People are actually telling me they like the new version better and my poor old tired eyes are looking at all of the white and wanting soft, muted colors and screaming...no!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      I do love your addition of in Consoleable. Dang...how in the world did I forget that one? Fabulous place...to add in, here... but not to be.

      Sending condolences. Join me in Deepest Sympathy.

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  18. I was surprised by the changes too Michele. Love your post and I hope we can both learn to navigate the new blog process.

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Michele Bilyeu blogs "With Heart and Hands" as she journeys between Douglas, Alaska and Salem, Oregon.