Gratitude: Channels of Light

As we enter the week, and the place, and the space of thanks-giving, I am drawn, as if by a magnet, to the channels of light amidst the dark and challenging spaces.

Each day, each moment, in this second home of mine in Alaska, is a moment to be treasured. It does not truly matter how hard that moment might be in physical, or even in emotional terms. It is never truly hard.....simply because I am blessed to have them. To have the moments, the spaces and the places that I can share with this amazing Alaskan family of mine. I just need to remember that, remember it each and every day as I have to take a deep breath and call on my reserves once again.

Yes, I miss my Oregon family of my own. I miss my hubby, my house, my three cats, my possessions, my hobbies and most of all...my time and space for me. But here, I can truly feel that I am being who I truly am. The person that I have spent a lifetime finding my way towards being. A person who seeks to give from herself in all ways.....the best that she can, without anger or judgment or self-pity. or blame. It's not easy. It is extremely, extremely hard. It just is... as it is here.....and I am, as I am. I have to be so many different kinds of accepting, so many different kinds of strong and call on reserves that I never truly knew I had in me.

One month ago, my mother almost died and my father was ill and giving up. Both were in emergency rooms and hospitals......and life was at its tide's greatest ebb.

Now, it is so bustling with life and with activity.... that there are few empty spaces inbetween. But the energy is invigorating and re-activating to lives that almost ended. And now it is bursting at the seams with new life, new energy, new heartfelt gratitude, and with re-newed hope.

Two days ago, I was reminded that life and death are only one breath apart. As the strongest member of my Alaskan family walked my mother up their living room stairs to her bedroom, she suddenly turned, twisted, lurched backwards and fell. She fell as if one was watching a stunt woman on a TV drama, twisting and turning all the way down the stairs.....to the very bottom.

My brother watched, helplessly and unbelievably, from the steep 10th step up.....as I ran across the width of the living room to her, my slippers falling off me and flying through time and space.

My mother murmured and then moved. Her neck was not broken, her bones felt smooth, the arm caught under her body came out easily. She talked to us and was able to follow the directions that I gave her.

When people tell you there is no such thing as a miracle, and that everything has an explanation for why it happens, I tell you that there are nothing but miracles....for our lives are filled with them. What we see and know to be true might not yet by fully evident, but all that is real and all that is illusion is simple that one breath away.

In the morning, my mother had no memory of the fall, whatsoever. She had no headache, and no bruises, and unbelievably so....no pain. As an empathic healer, my own ribs were on fire, my head pounded, and every single inch of my body is in agony. But I am perfectly fine in every way.

Explain to me, then, I gently ask...how can this possibly be? Because I am doing what I was meant to do, I quietly whisper.....and everything is......exactly as it should be. And that..... is what Thanksgiving is truly about.

shown above:
The Gastineau Channel, a flowing current between two firmaments of land that created the city of Juneau and the town of Douglas.

Alaska.

Hallmark E-card Virus

Since about August 15th, a new virus began circulation through the Internet using sender names of people you think you 'know'. Problem is...the e-card that you think is from a loved one sent through Hallmark or a similar card company will most likely not only be a fake...but will also harbor the latest in email viruses and an especially bad one at that.

Don't open it! Delete it, unopened and unread.

Unlike most similar warnings that end up being scams, urban myths etc. this particular one is by all signs...real. Snopes.com labels it 'true' and Hallmark.com gives advice on how to recognize viral cards, report them, and of course...just plain delete them...UNOPENED!

Boy, that grinch sure knows how to reach out and touch someone during the holidays! Oh wait, is that the phone company or Hallmark ;) It might just be time to make a phone call this holiday season or make your own card and snail mail it. Email scams are a tad bit too plentiful any time of the year, but this time somehow seems a tad bit meaner.

Hallmark.com says:
"A fraudulent e-mail flooding the Internet claims to have a link to an E-Card from a family member, friend or neighbor and uses major greeting card company names such as Hallmark. Clicking on the link downloads a virus onto your computer that compromises personal data.What you can do:

Report suspicious e-mail to your e-mail service provider so they can take action.File a complaint at http://www.ic3.gov/ or Forward the suspicious e-mails to abuse@hallmark.com. Don't expect a response back, they are being flood with complaints already.

Delete the fake e-card, unopened and unread !!!!!!!

If you are unsure if you've received a legitimate Hallmark E-Card, don't click on a link in the e-mail. Instead use our E-Card pickup.

If you do click on the link in the bogus e-mail, you will launch a variant of the Zapchast Trojan virus. Zapchast installs an Internet Relay (IRC) chat client and causes the infected computer to connect to an IRC channel. Attackers then use that connection to remotely command your machine.

What Hallmark is doing:
Contacting the Internet providers identified as the source of the spam requesting that they shut down the impostors.

Working with Microsoft to include the virus code in their phishing filter to protect consumers who use their web browser and e-mail client software.
Working with anti-virus software corporations to get the virus code added to virus definition updates.

True Hallmark E-Cards are not downloaded and they are not .exe files.
In addition, Hallmark.com will never require an E-Card recipient to enter a user name or password nor any other personal information to retrieve an E-Card.

E-mail Safety Tips:
Do not open e-mails from unknown senders.

Don't open an e-mail you know to be spam. A code embedded in spam advertises that you opened the e-mail and confirms your address is valid, which in turn can generate more spam.

If you receive an attachment that you are not expecting, don't open it, even if it's from someone you know. First read the e-mail, and make sure the attachment is most likely legitimate. If you're still not sure, call or e-mail the sender to confirm, but do not reply to the original e-mail.

Some fraudulent e-mails that appear to be from financial companies (PayPal, banks, credit card companies, etc.) direct the reader to click on a link to verify or confirm account details. Never click these links. Instead, call the company if you are concerned about your account.

E-Card Fraud Alert :

http://www.hallmark.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/article%7C10001%7C10051%7C/HallmarkSite/LegalInformation/FAQ_ECARD_FRAUD_ALERT

Veteran's Day Quilting

Before I headed up to Alaska in late August, I made this quilt, with my last remaining uncle in mind, and in honor of those who served in the Armed Forces in World War II.

My intention was to send it to a nursing home in Medford, Oregon where my Uncle Elmer was placed after a diagnosis of Post Traumatic Stress/Dementia.

This uncle, like my father, was one of five brothers who all served in World War II at the same time. They were known as a 'Five Star Family' signifying five sons all served in the Armed Forces at one time. And my Finnish Alaskan Grandparents were so recognized and honored by the United States Government (after the end of the war) with a medal and a decorative certificate.

My Uncle Albert was the co-pilot of a plane that was shot down during the war. The pilot was shot and killed and my uncle (also injured) had to take over the controls of the plane and make a forced landing in the water. He died of his wounds on impact, but saved the lives of the other remaining men on board.

There are many stories like this one, from that war and all others. My family's loss was no greater than that of many families, and like in many families, some suffer lifelong physical ailments and others....lifelong mental, or emotional ones.

In honor of those men who lived, yet suffered the stresses of war, loss, and a level of emotional pain that most of us will never understand, I made this quilt for this last living uncle...... now in this Oregon nursing home.

My Uncle Elmer has an incredibally high IQ and a photographic memory, and and thus he carries a lot of difficult memories and life experiences and their challenges. This quilt honors him, symbolically holds him, and wraps him up away from his losses, and is meant to remind him that faith can still bring inner peace......beyond loss and pain.

I was only home in Salem for a few weeks after returning from over a month in Alaska, before I was called back to help my parents in Alaska again. But I managed to finish the binding on this quilt, and sew on a label during that brief period of rest. It won't make my intended Veteran's Day gift deadline. But when I am home again, I will wrap it, and mail it to the Alzheimer's foster nursing home in southern Oregon for him. I hope that its warmth, and the love that created it will bring him peace and someday, it can go on to hang on a wall there for all, in memory of my Uncle Elmer.

Today, our American holiday of Veteran's Day, honors all Veterans of all wars. I honor them in thought and in memory, and soon... I hope to honor them with this Heartstrings Quilting Project patriotic quilt, as well.

Walking a New Path of Hope

From Alaska!

"........What an impact, to watch not only friends but America at large emerge from the spell of jaded apathy that has marked this dark period of American politics, and see how meaningful this is for so many of us to feel a very real sense that hope and change are actually possible, even within this most dark and corrupt institution.

We ARE the ones we have been waiting for, emerging from the crysallis, and it's inspiring to see so many people catalyzed into positivity and action. Here's to holding on to the light for Obama-- we will need to hold onto the energy this election inspired in these times ahead!"

Excerpt from an email I received from my oldest daughter. It serves to remind me that many who had all but lost hope, have now regained it....and nothing is as powerful as hope.

shown above:
A path at the site of the Treadwell Gold Mine, Douglas Island, Alaska

Things are Heating Up in Alaska

Things are heating up in Alaska. We are having a record number of voters turning out at the polls and it is surprisingly easy to vote, here. There is of course, a lot of opinions and all of us are of course, opiniated:)

Our family does not vote straight party, nor do we vote based on where we live, or who others might feel represents us. We vote as our hearts and souls lead us with hopefulness for change and prosperity and the good of all.

My parents, ages 91 and 83, and both just recently rushed to Emergency Rooms, oth voted today.I thought I would have to get everyone dressed, walker loaded into a borrowed car, and all necessary identifications ready to go. Instead, a brother simply asked about voters with disabilities, and was sent home with an instant version of an absentee ballot.

I read the candidates out loud to my mother, and was delighted at both her recall, and opinions. In spite of a childhood based on prejudice and racism, she is an amazingly open and accepting woman. One who welcomes change and possibilities.

After lifetimes of challenges, she and my father have both learned to accept others, and see their strengths and potential, and not simply old judgements or misintended falsehoods.

With age, often comes wisdom and the ability to truly see what is real, and what is false, and what is needed and needs to be accepted for the best of all. I was so proud of them both as I watched them with their thick reading glasses on, wading their way through the ballots.

When asked her choices, she announced them firmly....and positively. Had she changed her mind from previously voiced names, I would have double checked, but still honored her choices, but I was delighted with her recall and clarity, as well as her ability to understand, and state her own opinions.

My father, trying to see through the reddened, still slightly swollen eyes from his shingles virus, still determined to vote and by himself. When none of us could find my mother's social security number in purse or files, it was my almost 92 year old father, still ill, who came up with both hers, and his own.

Both are doing well, my mother recovered with her life saving rush to the ER 2 weeks ago, my dad in a the ending phase similar to PHN...post herpetic neuralgia, the shingles after effect of nerve/muscle spasms that follows shingles in the elderly.

We discovered that a lidocaine spray immediately lessened the spasm and that ice packs seemed to delay them. But a follow up visit to the Dr. gave him pain pills based on PHN spasms and helped to relieve the anxiety that comes with fear of the unknown more than even the discomfort of pain.

Just as with change, growth and acceptance of that which we think we do not want, comes a place of making the best of things...no matter what cards we are dealt or where the chips may fall.

In our case, it might be cheetos and fritos (which we ate along with our BLT's with Tillamook pepper jack cheese) but fall they do....and we are learning to make the most of .....and the very best of .....each and every day.

We listen to beautiful music, we have beauty parlor and pedicures at home days, and we tell stories of our childhoods and hopes for our futures. We all watch "Dancing With the Stars" and the evening news. We delight in our visits from family, and my own phone calls from home. But most of all, we delight in one another...in our silliness, and our ability to laugh at ourselves.

Each day brings unknown change and many surprises...some good and some not so good. But any day that we have freedom, the right to choose, and the right to our own opinions is a good day.

As our homemade, plastic bag balloon proclaims...'We voted.' Myself before I came up to Alaska by mail, and my parents at home. But we voted. Have you?